While we are starting to wake up to the fact that coaches, like players, need to take care of their mental health and wellbeing, there is still such a long way to go to make that an industry priority.

It is important, though, that in a vocation that doesn’t always look after us, we do our best to look after ourselves.

Here are some ideas that might help you do just that..

Understand why you coach

Everyone gets into coaching for one reason or another.

It could be that you have stopped playing but want to stay involved in the game, want to contribute to your community or that your child has started playing and the club needs volunteers to help run the team.

It is true that everyone stays in coaching for a reason, too. Hopefully you enjoy it or you get a lot out of it. 

Maybe it is helping you develop skills that support you in other areas of your life. Or, maybe, you feel like if you weren’t doing it, who else would?

Whatever your reasons are, having an understanding of them will give you a firm base to refer back to and make your decisions from. 

The most obvious question to ask yourself is: are your reasons positive? If you started coaching to stay involved in the game, are you enjoying staying involved?

If you are continuing to coach because you feel like the team depends on you, is that a valid reason? Are you being fair on yourself? You deserve to enjoy it too.

Don’t be afraid to step back

It is probably not something I should be advocating so early in this piece, but I’m not sure we say it enough: if coaching isn’t serving you, don’t be afraid to step back from it.

I have a good friend that has done just that, having decided that coaching wasn’t for them anymore. It is really brave to admit that to yourself and give yourself the permission to stop coaching.

Soccer isn’t going anywhere – if you want to come back to it in the future, it’s there. And if you don’t, that’s okay, too.

One thing I have learned from watching my friend stop coaching is that others are really quick to say, "You’ll be back soon" or "You just need to find the right club for you". 

While never ill-intentioned, these kinds of comments don’t necessarily give space for the experiences of the person stopping coaching.

So if you want to stop coaching, give yourself some grace. And if you see others doing it, give that grace to them, too.